Today I unfriended someone on Facebook, unfollowed another person on Twitter, and told a good friend I didn’t have the energy to talk to her. I am tired of listening to negative people.
In the interest of full disclosure, I admit I’ve been a negative person myself. I have gone through periods of deep unhappiness, anger, and despair where I ranted and complained and vented, ad nauseum. I looked that up, just to be sure what it meant.
Ad nauseum: something that has been done or repeated so often that it has become annoying or tiresome.
YES! I have been ad nauseum! 😊
To my friends and family who listened, thank you. I am grateful. You helped me, and gave me hope, and now thanks to you and God’s grace and my stubborn persistence and the passing of time I have quite a bit of tranquility and joy in my life. Still a few hard things, but I’ve learned to pick out the good and think more about them than the other.
It’s so much better to live that way. As a complainer in the past, I don’t have much patience with those who are still that way. Which makes me feel…selfish. Shouldn’t I have endless compassion for people who are distressed and unhappy, just like friends once did for me? I think I should. I try. I don’t always get there.
Perhaps I’m like an alcoholic, long addicted to the drama of injustice and insult. I finally got sober, but I’m not yet strong enough to make it through a pub crawl of endless misery-talk from someone else. Or maybe I’m like an ex-smoker who discovered how much flavor there is in food and how sweet roses smell since he gave up smoking and now recoils at the thought of returning to the foul gray haze of re-told old hurts.
So, that’s where I am. I had a delicious concoction of roasted asparagus and bacon for lunch. One sweet child has a new puppy and another returned safely from a long trip. Last night’s bike ride was great! Tonight’s restorative yoga, divine.
Yes, I face things that are difficult and challenging, but what the heck. If you want me to help you, let me buy your entry to a yoga class, take you on a bike ride, or invite you to sit around a campfire in the country at sunset as lightning bugs come out. There might be adult beverages in a cooler or local free-range organic grass-fed hot dogs to grill. Did I tell you I have chrome Williams Sonoma grill sticks? My farm might be in Kentucky, but I cook out with class.
Let’s share those activities. Then we’ll talk, and I’ll listen. I want you to listen to me too.
© 2018 Deborah Rankin